You often hear people say that learning English is difficult because of our odd verb forms and words that sound the same but are spelled differently and mean different things. But what about our use of adjectives?
In recent years, we’ve moved to keeping the language tighter due to online use, texting, etc. And marketing types have latched onto this way of making their products sound snappier and of targeting their audiences quickly.
Take the simple pair of socks, for example. I went to buy a couple of pairs of socks for diabetics – a friend needed them. The socks would have to be loose enough not to cause any swelling of my friend’s legs. When I asked the saleswoman for assistance, she handed me two packages of “Diabetic Socks.” Now I wanted socks for a diabetic person, not socks which already suffered from diabetes and I told her that. After looking at me as if I was a weirdo, she assured me these were the right ones. Before I handed them over to my friend though, I checked the instructions on the package to make sure they did not require any special care – such as medication for their diabetes.
I know this sounds a bit “out there” but honestly, at the book store, I discovered that we now have “reading socks.” Since when did socks learn to read? Some people are worried about artificial intelligence taking over the world, but I’m leery about what those socks are reading. And can you get them to read to your kids while you take a deserved nap? Are they bilingual?
Sock used to be just socks – yes there were wool socks, cotton socks and nylon socks. And even tube socks which could be used by persons of any size for whatever activity they intended to take part in – they were a good investment for me as a mother of four boys. And the word “tube” described the design of the socks. Nowadays we have every type of sock imaginable and don’t even get me started on sports socks. They have a life of their own and also subcategories such as baseball socks, football socks, running socks, (watch out for those) and even tennis socks.
Knee socks bother me. Everyone – at least those of us who understand anatomy— know that you can’t put a sock on a knee. Yes, you can cut off the sock’s toe, turn the heel to the front and then slide it up your leg to your knee. But what you have created is a knee warmer, not a knee sock. Knee-high socks is the correct term and describes the socks properly. As does the term elbow-length gloves – not elbow gloves which, similarly, are impossible.
When I was young we wore cotton socks in the summer and warm woolly ones in the winter. Our socks were not sentient, nor attuned to various activities. They just were.
Now for someone learning the English language, there are so many kinds of socks and the adjectives used must drive them crazy. And it is not just socks suffering from overuse of marketing-targeted adjectives. No one has simple shoes or t-shirts anymore – they all have adjectives. We are drowning in them. I pity students wrestling with learning the English language and trying to buy socks.
I am stubborn and refuse to categorize my socks. They are socks, they keep my feet warm and cozy. Yes I have several pairs, but that is because they are different colours, not because they have different vocations – or can read – those still scare me.
How many pairs of socks do you have? Do they have any special talents?
